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08 May 2007 @ 19:45
Expecting Part 3 (Repost)  
Title: Expecting Part 3/?
Author: jemzamia
Rating: 15
Pairing: Jack/Ianto
Summary: Owen explains everything
Part 1
Part 2

Owen had never been so relived in his life. He finally got to the bottom of it. The question that could have stood the test of time. Why was Ianto pregnant? It had been a gruelling 3 weeks. Going through countless biology books. Associating any slight similarities of the male reproductive system and the female and how that could have conceived a child. After going through them a few times Owen considered becoming a gynaecologist. He certainly knew his way around the female system, Owen chuckled to himself in his head.

He had constantly scanned through the Torchwood reports. Two to be exact. Two short, vague reports that both came to the conclusion: unknown causes. Great, Owen thought, big fat help that was. He even researched the biology of seahorses! Which Owen found a complete bore and a waste of time. I’m definitely not becoming a seahorse biologist, Owen thought. Owen was about to give up when the DNA testing beeped, signalling its completion of the results. Owen expected nothing to come from them. But to his surprise those results made everything come together.

So here Owen was, wearing his lab coat with his humorous badges on with Gwen and Tosh looking down at him from the balcony. Watching him like a theatre performance on a brightly lit stage. They were hanging over the grey bars again, to Owen’s annoyance. He knew that whenever they did that it meant they were bored and were paying little attention. And after all the grief Owen had been through with this project he wasn’t going to be unrecognised for his achievement.

Ianto was sat on the steps with Jack close behind him. Ianto’s belly was a tiny bit bigger now. Ianto had also got into the habit of resting his hand there as well. Owen had put him at about 3 to 4 months along now. Ianto was beginning to enjoy his pregnancy now. His vomiting had died down a bit. Also Jack was always coming up to him for stolen kisses and to see if he was ok. It was baby bliss. Even Gwen had begun to talk to Ianto about prams and other baby stuff.

Which kind of made Owen feel a bit guilty about bringing the harsh reality back to them. Owen sighed, switched on his interactive remote and began.
“Alright kiddies! Settle down or I’ll put you in the naughty corner!” Owen joked as he always did. Everyone turned their attention towards Owen with an overall look of annoyance on their faces. They knew Owen was going to be the know-it all show off during his presentation. And they didn’t want to encourage it by pretending to respect him.

After receiving his frosty reception of glares, Owen began as if he had not seen them.
“As you all may know. Over the past few weeks I’ve been racking my clever mind about how Ianto got pregnant. And I’ve finally got the answer, kiddies!”
“Oh just get on with it Owen!” Gwen complained.
“Excuse me, are you the doctor?” Owen sneered.
“JUST GET ON WITH IT!” everyone screamed. Slightly surprised at the outbursts Owen carried on with a little smirk of satisfaction on his face.
“Right. I got nothing from previous reports, which I was surprised Ianto hadn’t thrown them away as they were about as much as a condom made of water. Mind you, you two might had as well,” Owen remarked at Jack and Ianto. Ianto looked a little flustered but he soon calmed down when Jack came a bit closer and kissed his ear.

“So basically I looked through everything. I even researched bloody seahorses! Which is not a very interesting subject I’d have you know! Anyway it looks like it was all going to shit until I got the results of Jack’s DNA test.”
“Wait a minute. What’s my DNA got to do with anything?” Jack interrupted.
“Well I’m about to bloody get to that” Owen quirked.
“Wow you’ve certainly got a gob on you today!” Gwen said.
“Well you should read about the bloody sex life of a seahorse for 3 nights in a row!” Owen yelled.
“You should try throwing up from 1am until 1pm,” Ianto butted in.

Owen sighed as Ianto had outwitted him. Again. Better recover, thought Owen.
“As I was saying. I got the results and they were very strange. But this is Jack we’re talking about so that wasn’t much of a surprise.”
Gwen ignored Owen’s remark and asked “Strange, how?”
“Well it turns out that Jack’s sperm is very fertile. And I mean very!” Owen looked around at the puzzled faces around him. None of them had a clue he was on about. Owen rolled his eyes. He felt like he was teaching Medical School Science to a bunch of pre-schoolers.
“All right, all right! I’ll explain my theory about it but you’ll regret it! Ok. Jack has very fertile sperm. It’s very active. It’s practically raving. So when Jack and Ianto are doing the business it’s a great big dirty rave. So when it’s…in Ianto it carries on raving. Another little fact we all know about Jack is that he is, well should be, the best shag in town…”
“No doubt about that,” Ianto cut in. Jack let out a hearty laugh and pulled his lover closer. Gwen and Tosh smiled at the sight while Owen rolled his yes again. If I keep on doing that I’m going to get astigmatism, Owen thought. He cast the thought aside and coughed very loudly to get everyone’s attention again.
“So when Jack’s fucking the living daylight out of Ianto, Ianto is bound to get excited. The horny little Welsh bugger he is. So excited that actually some of his sperm goes down the wrong tube and ends up in his bowel. Where Jack’s sperm is having an almighty rave. They meet, have a little rave dance and pop you’ve got yourself a baby!”

The rest of the team just stared at Owen with their mouths wide open. They were totally taken aback. Not only by the explanation but also at the way it was presented. Owen was loving every minute of it. Sure he’d now broken the baby joy around the Hub but he could give a shit now. All he wanted was to lap up their expressions and enlarge his ego. This is what I come to work for, he thought with a large smirk across his face.

“Well you asked!” He finally said.

Current Location: Teh Pit
Current Mood: creativecreative
Current Music: Positive Tension - Skins Soundtrack
Tessa: KingIantotiggerbrasilf on 8th May 2007 18:53 (UTC)
Hey, I hadn't realised this was your story (: Are you going to finish it for us sometime? (:
__♥..Jemz-y Baby..♥__jemzamia on 8th May 2007 18:58 (UTC)
I am delighted to say Ive finally got my muse back n will try! XD
I was catolgging it for TW Libary n couldnt find PART 3. God usualy Im organised to milatary standards XD

Ill get some done tonight XD
Tessa: KingIantotiggerbrasilf on 8th May 2007 19:09 (UTC)
Its ok everyone can have bad times sometimes. Nothing wrong with being unorganised sometimes. Its a cool story so far so it'll be interesting to see where its going (:
__♥..Jemz-y Baby..♥__jemzamia on 8th May 2007 19:12 (UTC)
Hehe ta
(Deleted comment)
__♥..Jemz-y Baby..♥__: Snog Mouthsjemzamia on 9th May 2007 15:04 (UTC)
LOL i am. I dont like cookie sbut i appreciate them XD
Libby  リビgeuna on 9th July 2007 01:15 (UTC)
Dude, all my questions about mpreg are answered!
__♥..Jemz-y Baby..♥__: Girl Power Rosejemzamia on 9th July 2007 16:48 (UTC)
LOL Yay! We should add it to the family medical book XD
lucy_harknesslucy_harkness on 12th February 2008 10:46 (UTC)
*giggles and falls over*
Hahahahaaa!! Jack's raving sperm!! hehehee awww man, i loved this part so much!!